


secrets

by fastestmanalive



Series: Barryoliver Week 2015 [2]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Coming Out, M/M, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-19
Updated: 2015-10-19
Packaged: 2018-04-27 03:05:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5031325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fastestmanalive/pseuds/fastestmanalive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>ooohh boy I'm nervous about this one. please tell me if I've said anything wrong/offensive/etc</p>
    </blockquote>





	secrets

**Author's Note:**

> ooohh boy I'm nervous about this one. please tell me if I've said anything wrong/offensive/etc

A knock on the door almost made Barry jump out of his skin.

Hands shaking, he put down the bottle of wine he was holding, careful not to brush his arm against the candles he'd lit on the dinner table as not to set his cardigan on fire.

He brushed his sweaty palms over his thighs, adjusting the hem of his shirt, suddenly hyper-aware of every cell of his body.

“Barry?” a voice sounded through the door, seeming concerned. “Are you there? Is everything okay?”

 _Calm down, you can do this_ , Barry told himself. “Come in,” he called, trying to keep his voice even.

The door opened, and Oliver poked his head inside with a smile. Barry couldn't help but return it; he took a deep breath and walked over to greet Oliver with a hug.

“Hey,” Oliver mumbled and grinned, kissing the side of his head before pulling away. “Is... everything okay?” he frowned when he saw the expression on Barry's face.

“I--” Barry swallowed around the lump in his throat. He could do this. “I have to tell you something.”

“Are you alright?” Oliver asked quietly, voice etched with concern, and rubbed a hand over Barry's arm.

“Let's just... sit down. Have dinner first. Don't-- don't worry, okay?” Barry tried to shrug it off. “It's-- It's nothing bad. Promise.”

Oliver didn't seem to believe him but nodded anyway. He seemed to trust Barry to tell him the truth.

Dinner was a stern affair. Oliver couldn't seem to relax, kept giving Barry concerned looks and taking his hand to squeeze it, a frown on his face the entire time. Barry tried to lighten the mood, tried to joke and mention amusing things that had happened to him at work lately, but to no avail.

“Ol,” Barry sighed when they were done eating. “Could you please just... I don't know, lose the brooding look?” Oliver's frown deepened. “C'mon, we barely see each other, I just wanna have a nice evening--”

“Something's up,” Oliver mumbled. “Something's bothering you. Just... tell me? Please? Maybe I can help--”

“It's not bothering me,” Barry interrupted quickly. He needed Oliver to know that what he was about to tell him wasn't a bad thing. Hopefully, Oliver would see it the same way. “It's just... something I haven't told you yet, and I want to. _Need_ to, really. Before... this,” he gestured between the two of them, “goes any further.”

If anything, Oliver looked even more confused. Sighing again, Barry got up to clear the table, Oliver following to help instantly. They moved around each other in perfect synch, as if they'd known each other for years, not weeks.

They sat down on the couch, facing each other. Barry took comfort in the warm touch of Oliver's hand on his knee, in their close proximity, foreheads only inches apart. Barry wanted nothing more than to lean forward and forget everything for a while, just get lost in _Oliver_ , but he couldn't.

“I really need to say something,” Barry started quietly. “Before I tell you what's up, I mean. I just-- I need you to know--”

“It's okay,” Oliver muttered, squeezing Barry's knee. “You can tell me anything, you know that.”

Barry huffed a little. Oliver made the whole thing seem so _easy_ , which... it probably was. Still, you could never tell how people would react to it. “It's just... I like you. A lot. I don't want things to change for-- for the worse.”

“I like you too,” Oliver replied immediately. “I feel like--” He stopped for a moment, all of a sudden looking hesitant. “I feel like I can be myself with you, you know?”

Barry's throat was tight, his ears pounding with blood, his palms sweaty again. “Me-- Me too,” he managed. “That's why-- I have to tell you something.”

“Sure.” Oliver squeezed his knee again, smiling at him reassuringly.

“Okay,” Barry began, biting his lip. “Okay, I-- The thing is... I'm--”

“Barry?” Oliver sent him a concerned look. “Is everything--?”

“I'm trans,” Barry rushed out, heart sinking when Oliver's eyes widened in surprise. “I mean. I'm a _guy_. But I-- I wasn't born...” He bit his tongue, cutting himself off effectively. He just... didn't know how to explain it, he hadn't come out to anyone in a while, and... well, this was _Oliver_. He looked down at his lap.

“You--” Oliver cleared his throat. “Were you... worried?”

Barry shrugged. “Yeah. I mean--”

“Barry,” Oliver interrupted gently, cupping Barry's chin with his hand and titled his head up to catch his gaze. “Talk to me? Please?”

It was hard to turn his eyes away when Oliver was looking at him so intensely. “It's just... usually people don't wanna be with me once they find out. I've lost a lot of friends, my High School girlfriend...” Barry shrugged again. “They all think I'm weird. And-- And I _know_ I'm not. I'm just... _me_.” The corner of his mouth lifted involuntarily in an almost-smile. “I just didn't know how you'd react. I wanna keep seeing you.”

Oliver had a look of empathy on his face, paired with a soft smile. “Thank you for telling me,” he mumbled.

“I--” Barry hesitated; Oliver raised his brows. “I haven't had bottom surgery yet.” Again, Oliver looked surprised. “I needed you to know before... you know.”

Oliver watched him for a few moments, looking thoughtful as he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. “As far as I'm concerned,” he said, finally, “I'm dating this really amazing guy. He's funny, smart, brave, _unbelievably_ handsome, and so far out of my league it's ridiculous.” Barry couldn't help but laugh. “This is-- It's another part of _you_. And I really wanna keep seeing you too.”

“It's a pretty big part of me,” Barry muttered with a sad smile. “Are you sure--?”

“Yes,” Oliver replied immediately, pressing their foreheads together, the hand still holding Barry's chin moving to cup his cheek instead. “Thank you for telling me,” he repeated with a sigh.

Barry wanted to say more, wanted to answer the questions Oliver was clearly holding back, but decided against it. For the moment, he was content in Oliver's embrace, beyond relieved that everything turned out okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written a transgender/non-binary character before so this makes me really nervous. I did quite a bit of research and asked for help and all but still please yell at me if I messed up!!


End file.
